Putnam City Middle School Teacher Tells a Lifetime of Humorous Tales

Great State
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BETHANY, OKLAHOMA -- It's not all thumbs in Matt Weinrich's 6th grade Keyboarding class.

Matt has his students learning to type the letters 'v' and 'y' with their pointers and using their right pinky for the shift key.

"It's a great group of kids," he says.

They seem to learning quickly.

It's Matt himself who, from time to time, gets the keys of his life jammed up.

His entire existence on earth, by his own admission, is a long series of mishaps and outright accidents.

He explains, "People say I'm awkward. I understand that."

He was always a happy kid.

But Matt was active, quick to make a funny face, or the first to jump off a cliff without looking.

"I just go straight ahead," he says. "Sometimes I reap the consequences from it."

When he was about his students' age, Matt shot himself in the eye with a crossbow.

He recalls, "The dart ricocheted off and hit me in the left eye."

He's now the coach of the Western Oaks Middle School in Bethany where he's reluctant to tell his players about the phase of his playing career where he thought he was Micheal Jordan.

He took an elbow while his tongue was hanging out.

"They stapled my tongue on in the emergency room," he recalls.

Weinrich says he's good for one or two really good mash ups every year.

He's married now and has a little boy of his own, but not even family could protect him from the spa jets in his bathtub.

They made strange marks on his back that doctors couldn't diagnose.

"They all thought I had Lyme Disease," he says. "Then one day it hit me as I was walking through the bathroom, after taking a bunch of serious medication, that I had been giving myself bathtub hickeys from the jets."

You might want to keep Matt out of the kitchen too.

He's not ready to openly talk about the strawberry incident that led to the untimely death of the family cat.

Instead, he wrote about it.

Matt also wrote about some of the other incidents and accidents that have punctuated his life.

"The big man upstairs is watching out for me," he says.

Weinrich as a lot of those accidents to choose from, but 17 of his best stories went into a book titled, 'Call Me Clumsy'.

He says it went together like one of his team's lay-up drills, one after another through the basket.

If we're lucky and he's not, Matt's first book may have other volumes that follow.

With him, the ball could drop at any time.

'Call Me Clumsy' is available for order from Amazon.

Matt also set up a website to promote his first publication.

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